The first thing to do is start off the tutoring relationship on a positive note with the parent in the hopes that when discipline issues come up, the parent will be more supportive. The way I handled this as a tutor was to send home a “progress report” each tutoring session. On this paper I would make notes about what we did, what I noticed and what the parent could do at home to further learning.

I always attempted to make a positive note in the “what I noticed” section, as well as any academic observations. Often the academic observations were made in a way to validate the parent’s concerns and reasons for hiring me in the first place. I also attempted to make the “for further study” section as simple and straight forward as possible so that any parent with any amount of involvement could do.

When I had a discipline problem I would note it on the progress report but would make a point to mention the problem to mom or dad in person. Often this gave me a great idea as to how helpful the parent would be in managing the difficult behavior.

Often, behavioral problems stemmed from frustration with the skill we were studying, so when the student would begin to act up, I would often stop and put the blame on myself:

“ok, wait a minute, let’s stop and back up, I don’t think I taught that very well. Let’s look at this part here a little closer.” and I would break the steps down even further or explain it again using different angles. I often employed the use of simple analogies as this seemed to help my students see a complicated problem in a more simple light.

If this doesn’t work, I’ll prompt the student to ask a question so that I can know what to teach.

If this doesn’t work, I’ll try changing the approach, do something new for a bit or adjust the final goal for that moment down a bit. So for example, if the student has to write a paper and I said ok let’s write the first paragraph now, I would say ok wait, lets just talk about the first sentence, how can we grab the reader’s attention?

By addressing behavior problems by drawing the attention back to learning, I kept the focus on the lesson at hand and developed the standard of never giving up and always trying.

Related posts:

1. Home Visits May Reduce Discipline Issues
2. Three Classroom Management Mistakes
3. Classroom Management: Lack of Parental Support

The topic of praising students is a sticky subject and some teachers disagree with praising students for doing things they should do out of respect, and only thank students for going above and beyond the call of duty.

The problem with his concept, though, is that the job of teaching children to act appropriately in different situations, as I did my daughter at the post office, belongs to the parent. While many parents are willing to take the time to teach their children these skills, many put their children in daycare instead, and let someone else will take care of the discipline. Day care workers are not substitutes for parental teaching and many teachers find themselves with students who are not trained to act appropriately in the classroom.

In a recent post on why saying “good job” is bad, I addressed the idea that praise needs to be specific in the classroom. Indeed, praise needs to be specific, and hold the double purpose of both creating a positive classroom atmosphere and teaching the children the appropriate way to act in the classroom.

Do your students benefit from parental discipline or does that job end up falling to you as the teacher? Share your stories!

Related posts:

1. Lesson Plans that Prevent Discipline Problems
2. Home Visits May Reduce Discipline Issues
3. Classroom Management: Lack of Parental Support

1. Raising your voice.

Raising your voice will only serve to escalate the problem. Even if the students quiet down or listen for a moment, it is only a temporary fix and will in fact cause more classroom management problems down the road.

2. Ignoring students.

This is different than ignoring student behavior, something that is sometimes necessary. Instead, a teacher who ignores students, or who is checked out, not caring about what happens in her classroom, is doing her students a huge disservice. If this is you, it is time to find a new job.

3. Relying on Parents.

This one is a sad truth about the culture of America today and in some situations is not true. While some parents are involved and do discipline their children, even for actions done at school, the age of a parent backing a teacher is in the past. It is time for teachers to find new ways to discipline children because threatening with a note or phone call home is becoming a useless act.

Related posts:

1. Maintain Classroom Management Without a Voice
2. Sarcasm in the Classroom
3. Success Story: Whisper Teaching

Related posts:

1. Ten Last Minute Classroom Management Tips
2. Why Students Misbehave
3. How to Manage Students who Lie at School

Now, teachers struggle to gain parental involvement and support for the positive things their children do, much less support their disciplinary efforts. This requires teachers to discipline children often without any support from home at all. It is important for teachers to understand this, and know for sure whether a parent is supportive of disciplinary efforts so that efforts in the classroom are not undermined.

A teacher who does not follow through with a warning or threat of disciplinary action will be the teacher that student know as the push-over. While many parents become push-overs and create classroom management issues for teachers by raising spoiled children, teachers need to be consistent and follow-through on their words.

If the teacher knows that the parent will not back a disciplinary action up at home, it is important that the teacher utilize some other strategy of discipline. Children who know that their parents will not discipline them at home do not care whether a phone call home or note home happens.

For more information on the lack of parental support, read about the drop-off generation.

More related information:

Increase parental support in the classroom

Home Visits Help Improve Parental Involvement

Related posts:

1. Using Praise for Basic Discipline
2. Home Visits May Reduce Discipline Issues
3. Three Classroom Management Mistakes